INSPIRED BY OBAMA (and sour diesel).

Jesus, I had no idea how zooted I was when they shot this video. That's what two Ls of Sour Diesel and plenty of vodka will do to you. Anyway, here's that video I told you about from the New York post.



Let there be no doubt that I was feeling extra glowy with those blue lights all around me.

LONG LIVE COMMON SENSE

Chicago's own Common came to my homestate last weekend, so I stopped by the all-new Club Sky to check it out. To be certain, this guy Common brings the women out in full force, and there were plenty of Lisa Lisas (80's version) in attendance. I wasn't alone, so I had to do the honorable thing and stay by the bar getting OVERTHROWED until dude hit the scene around midnight or so. Wouldn't want to look thirsty like the ladies, and man were they parched...





When I say that the ladies spazzed, I mean it. I knew that Common had fans, but I didn't know that he is, on the low, approaching L.L. Cool J status with the female rap base. Maybe on the high. And when I say that the high majority of these women were sexy, I say it because the shit is true, on the low.





Com came through, sat at the couch with an extra big bodyguard from Birmingham that my homegirl says she dated for a second. This dude was widebody like a walrus, but he had that roscoe/biscuit/heater/toolie/pistola on his hip, and his size alone was suggestive enough that nobody really tried to push up on Chi-Town's Nas like they couldn't control themselves. Yet he still managed to pull off his job without reaching for the burner and keeping an ill mean mug on his grill, just in case a heifer started acting a donkey, if you will. With his fat ass.





I let the ladies get their kicks and giggles before running up on Common, Bamma-style, and saying, "Thanks for coming to Alabama, cousin." He seemed pleased that he was so well received. It's funny, oh my brothers and sisters; most outsiders always seem super-surprised when they visit the state in which I was raised. They have a wide-eyed stare, and a simple smile that suggests that they didn't expect so much deep south love (NOLO). Common definitely enjoyed the crowd's response to his appearance.





From there, Common cut through the crowd with the assistance of the big dude and stood in the stairwell that led to the DJ booth and pool room--pretty much the only place from which he could effectively perform. He commenced to rock. See video below, and please don't bitch and moan about the darkness; just be grateful for the flashing lights of nearby cameras. You want better quality, I suggest you invest.


Here's the Com'z rocking "Go!" from his debut album on G.O.O.D. Music, Be...




Here's "Testify"...




Check the crowd response to "Universal Mind Control", the Neptunes-produced lead single...




From there, he dropped "The Light" (which would have come in handy for my camera) and closed up shop to loud applause and cheers. I have to say that I continue to be impressed by Common when it comes to longevity. He's one of the few rap artists that has been around for ten years of which I can still call myself a fan. Really, it shouldn't be much longer before we just stop fronting all together and put him in the Top 5 of all time. Like he said on "Get 'Em High": "Real rappers is hard to find--like a remote... control rap is out of."


Next up: Musiq. That's right; the cross-eyed R&B singer. I caught him doing his thing as well in Alabama, so I figured why not post it up. Check back tomorrow or the next day for that. And hey!! Thanks for giving me your attention for the last two years.

Make sure you cop Universal Mind Control when it drops (hopefully) on December 9.



"Should have my own reality show called, Soul Survivor."
-Common; "Get 'Em High"

FRIDAY NIGHT LIVE IN NEW YORK CITY

Visiting New York City is a surreal experience for anyone from the deep south. To be honest, I've always been against the idea of living in The Big Apple but happy to visit for a day or two. The feeling I've always taken away is that nobody should have to pay that much just to survive, no matter how cool the people are. But there is the key; the people in New York do make the city, and the environment creates a hardened (nolo) perspective--the NY State of Mind--that exists in even the most anti-social residents of any and every borough.

The first major difference I felt was when I opened up my laptop at the Chili's Too in La Guardia. Nobody tripped. Not that I would have cared; I do it all the time in Georgia, Alabama and Tennessee, and nobody says shit then either, but the feeling that is displayed on their faces takes body language to a new level of expression, especially when it comes to looking like a hater.

As you see below, I've been riding with Obama since the beginning, and the sticker along with my smile should show you just how I feel if you're looking at me sideways. But again, that's what I'm used to in the south; in New York City I was reminded by the relaxed look on the faces of onlookers that I was among friends, even before I had branched out into the city. As a welcoming sign of acceptance and mutual political thought, it was quite a relief.





Being the third trip I've made to NYC since I've been old enough to drink, this was by far the best time I've had. After an incredibly janky flight, we landed and were towed into the gate as the flight crew threw on "The Sweetest Taboo." Don't ask axe me why our plane couldn't steer and push itself. At least the mood music calmed me down after all the turbulence and whatever else was really wrong with the damned plane. Thank God for Sade and solid ground.

Anyway, I was in town for an interview with a NY-based website that shall remain nameless until the word is official, possibly longer. If you haven't noticed by now, I'm really into anonymity. Fame is an unnecessary side effect to being effective at my craft, and I'd rather sacrifice the spotlight than the joy of loving the job. While I was hanging around SoHo, I visited The Huffington Post before taking the R train to 57th street to get up with the homie White Jesus.


[The homies White Jesus, David and Stella Artois]


Because I was already planning for and expecting a positive trip, I setup my iPod while still in Atlanta Thursday night with NYC-inspired music, to give me a better respect for the subway ride and scenery. While moving through underground Manhattan, I was listening to shit like "Pacifics" by Digable Planets on repeat. That's always been a song that reminds me most of how you NY cats live. Funny how it made much more sense when heard on the subway. You hear, through the headphones, the influences of the train itself in the music, through background noise captured in the track. The sound effect gives it way more clarity than if you were listening through home stereo or car speakers. Experiencing NY Hip-Hop in NY is like drinking Evian directly from a river stream in the French Alps, without the hassle of the plastic bottle. Fresh.




From there, I made the trip to the area (edited) where the homie White Jesus lives and works. Having a best friend who happens to have a good job (edited by request) is a perk in any city, but in NYC it makes a serious difference. The homie lives in an area that is straight out of Seinfeld or Friends. Very urban, but very sociable and lively. And very Jewish. Like the homie says, "It ain't Karate..." Inside joke. Think hard enough and you'll get it.

Back to the story, we got on some Ketel One at his crib, then took a cab to TriBeCa to get up with some other friends who live in town. They had the hookup on the leprechaun delivery, so we stayed put until around 11 p.m., chiefing that great, high-powered Sour Diesel and Apple Jacks. Legalize it!!!





Next, we hit up the apartment of a former co-worker from my bartending days. She had recently moved to Brooklyn, so we were able to visit her and her roommates on the way to the club for a few extra free drinks and our first game of "Thumper." If you've never played it, it's another one of those games that white people play when they're getting OVERTHROWED. And that shit is pretty fun, especially when you have some drunk white women surrounding you in a semi-circle and doing all types of crazy dances and gestures. Here's an example:





Moe finally had enough and steered us towards the party in Brooklyn before we got too juiced up with the party girls, who were headed to their own little shendig around the corner. We took another cab to the club, where all we had to do to get in free was agree to be interviewed on camera about how President-elect Barack Obama has inspired us. Supposedly this video interview will be available tomorrow on their website. If so, I'll post a link. If not, forget that I said that. But I did take a photo of the guys doing the interviewing, just for posterity and so that I'd look like a tourist.




The party was ehhh, but at least there were some other cats that I knew from Atlanta in the building. We spoke to a few ladies, drank more than a few G+Ts and stayed until around 3 a.m. The women were weird; they stared all night but were too timid to respond when we spoke, so I left it alone. Don't you hate a shy chick? Didn't really matter; I wasn't there to try my one-night stand luck; I was there to drink with the homies. Mission accomplished.




We'll leave all the other details out, but the moral is that I had a great time in New York. This was the way I always wanted to experience the city, and just when I've developed the proper mentality to deal with NYC, I see that the city responds to my demands. It gave me the impression that even though people swear up and down that it's an almost impossible lifestyle to lead, which I would have agreed with before this weekend, New York City is still the Mecca of American civilization and the birthplace of Hip-Hop. Because I've always been assumed to have originated in either NY or LA--yet I'm actually from Alabama--it felt like a homecoming of sorts. I can't lie; I pretty much fell in love with the city this past Friday, and I feel like I'm cheating.

The next day, White Jesus had a meeting at his job (edited) and I had a hangover that was not ready to quit before noon, so I woke up, popped a Claritin with a bottle of Pellegrino like the elitist I am and went right back to sleep on the couch. I woke up able to breath and refreshed, ready to hit the Sour Diesel again and grab a slice with the homie before hitching a cab ride back to La Guardia to make my grand exit.

On the way back, I had a great convo with the cabbie, who almost turned me down for a ride from the area (edited for White Jesus's anonymity), but changed his mind because "I talked to him with respect." My man was of Arab descent and a hard-core Democrat. We talked the whole ride about the historic implications of an Obama adminstration and how we've got to work as a world community to keep our differences from becoming rivalries, no matter how far apart we are geographically, ethnically or ideologically. When I arrived at the curbside check-in for Delta flight 925, he wished me good luck on being offered the writing job and thanked me for the conversation.

Jesus. I think I love New York. Don't be mad, Atlanta. Just step your game up before I leave your tired ass.

T.O.C. #40 - Racist Alabama Rednecks and Obama's Late N*gger Father

[Young Obama]


TODAY:

Everyone that wears the color red and likes elephants was busy trying to spin the ridiculousness that is Governor Sarah Palin into a fairy tale story. And in such red states as Alabama, my "sweet home", I'm sure that there were thousands of others who were doing their best to turn salt into sugar.





Before you even ask axe, hell no, I'm not watching the Republikkkan convention. I'd rather watch Fox News for a whole year than see a concentrated version of lies, manipulation and race-baiting, put on by the same people who are responsible for this sad state of the union we are now living through. And I rather you killed me, had me cremated, pissed in my urn and served it after the funeral to my family as lemonade than to watch Fox News for even a whole day. So there's your answer to how I think the GOP is doing this week.





See, ever since the Republikkkans had their hoe card pulled by a bluff from God called "Hurricane Gustav", they've been scrambling all over the television news in a desperate collective attempt at pulling their skirts back down. They know that Palin is bad news, and they'd have to believe that we are all idiots (which, of course, they do) if they really think we believe that this woman is the best person to replace Senator John McCain if he croaks on the job. God forbid that that happens (hell, God forbid he wins...), but having Palin as safety net is worse than using pantyhose to break a 10k foot fall from the sky. Maybe even thinner. Not an exercise of good judgment.

As you know, Governor Palin's daughter GAVE UP THE DRAWS AND GOT KNOCKED UP. Senator Barack Obama, the next POTUS, made a formal announcement that "family is off limits." Not only was this statement an excellent political move, as it keeps him on the news during the GOP convention, but it showed his human element. That is, Obama is showing that he would do unto others as he would have them do unto him. Remember when they were tripping on Michelle? Well, now Michelle is off limits, just like the "experience" argument evaporated once Palin became the official VP nominee for the dead elephants. I swear, this Palin lady is killing every weapon that the GOP had against Obama.





So today, as I was checking my email and the daily news online at a place called STIR CRAZY in Birmingham, Alabama, I was caught totally off-guard when I heard one of the most random racist rants I've heard recently. I'm sure you're already thinking to yourself, "Come on, Mike. You were in Alabama! What did you expect?" Well, I didn't expect for a large white man to blurt out loud, in what I guess was his response to the media's sharking of Palin's personal family problems:

"Obama had a white mama, and his daddy was a nigger!"





On a day that my own blog started with Marcus Garvey, School Daze and a hanging Klansman, what else could I have expected? For the record, I was shocked out of my mind. Contrary to popular belief, that kind of public outburst or display does not happen in Alabama often; they save that shit for the backwoods Klan meetings usually, and they still whisper. But yeah, I was stuck, trying to decide whether or not I'd really heard what I heard. And it's funny that the only other black person that was there earlier had just left before the white guy went Kramer with the loud N-bomb. I guess, because I was sitting in a corner with my back turned to the other customers, the guy didn't see me and thought he was safe to return to his racist comfort zone, back in the old boys club. And he never acknowledged me afterwards, although his ladyfriend kept looking at me nervously as I went near their places at the bar to order a Long Island and to give them a heads-up that there was still a nigger in attendance.

The other customers made no eye contact with me. The bartender, whose name is also Mike, was trying to look as if he had been too busy to hear what was said. A guy who smelled like rancid ham - who was actually a cool guy - kind of made himself busy at the pool table. These people were both speaking to me when I entered, and now they looked ashamed to be in my range of vision. Weirdness...

After conferring with my colleague MAURICE GARLAND via Twitter, I realized that the best move was to exit before I said something that got me jumped by said redneck and maybe 6 other worthless elephant man-looking goons, because that would have only resulted in me returning to the bar with a dozen or so friends who live nearby and setting the place on fire. Did I just say that? Just kidding.

So what is the moral of this story? Well, let's just say that when Republikkkans get nervous, they get desperate. They revert back to the way they really are without the cloak of invisibility that covers their red necks and fat, elephant asses. Once the shield is removed, they say anything they want, and I can't blame them. If this is how they plan to respond to the fact that Governor Palin is a horrible candidate, then I feel sorry for them. They can call me and every other black person in the world a nigger, and it won't make Palin a good mother. They can shout about the fact that Senator Obama was born to an 18-year old mother, and it still won't kill his credentials. They can piss me off, but they can't control my temper, even if I don't lose it. And no, Alabama isn't really that bad, but racism exists everywhere, and shows up when you least expect it. That's what I've learned - never be surprised by it.

You know how you know you're on the winning side? When the other side gets angry. Oh, and plus they were all musty as hell. At least us "niggers" believe in good hygiene and don't use toilet seats as horseshoes.




"Home is where the hatred is..."
- Gil Scott Heron

THE OBAMA CRUSADE: Day 36 - THE JOE SHOW

TODAY:


Let's start with the shucking and jiving Anne Price Mills, a Democratic delegate for Senator Hillary Clinton, who was interviewed immediately following the speech given by Clinton by the Queen of the TV Lite-Brites, Suzanne Malveaux. I'm not the only one who believes that she was planted by the GOP and told to stir up mixed emotions. I mean, why the hell was she crying? And what was she trying to say at the very end, when she starts to speak on Senator Barack Obama's "resume", then let's her head down, shrugging and sighing? Should we be dissappointed in the nominee? GTFOH.

Notice the guy standing next to her and the white guy standing behind Suzanne when she finally pulls the microphone away to end the interview. Last question: Why are all of these African-American and Hispanic/Latino people coming out of the woodwork and repeating Republickin talking points - right when the DNC is happening? It's either a setup or some of that old slave mentality stuff coming back, I tell ya. Either way, I'm sure the GOP is happy about it. It sews confusion, and confusion is a strategy for victory when properly executed. And this is one confused black woman...




On another note, we will see both Senator Joe Biden and former President Bill Clinton speak tonight. Who knows what Bill will say, but I can give you some hints as to what Biden will offer.

First of all, Joe Biden is known for being a little unbridled, but EVERYONE AGREES THAT HE SPEAKS THE TRUTH. To be honest, I was never as worried about Barack's chances against Hillary as I would have been if he were matched against Biden. Anyone still hanging on to a fear that Biden may not have been the correct choice, watch the video below. I'm telling you, this guy is official...




Expect this guy to come out swinging against the Republickins. Expect Clinton to talk about himself and to say just enough nice things about Barack to get over. And expect the GOP strategists to officially start worrying after tonight.

THE OBAMA CRUSADE: Day 33

[I'm going to wait for a day or two to weigh in on why Senator Barack Obama, by selecting Senator Joe Biden as his VP candidate, has made a great political move. Too many people are putting up nonsense opinions right now. I prefer it quiet when I'm speaking.]


TODAY:


Sunday is always the day that the major networks do the weekly wrap-up in political and governmental affairs. This weekend, the talk of the nation is still Obama/Biden but several other stories are also emerging. Senator Hillary Clinton is expected to RELEASE HER DELEGATES and the Rules and Bylaws committee of the Democratic Party have FULLY RESTORED THE MICHIGAN AND FLORIDA DELEGATES, both just in time for the national convention, which begins tomorrow.


But keep this in mind:

Some of Clinton's supporters were outraged that the delegates were not fully reinstated in May. They were also angry that Obama claimed some of the delegates won by Clinton in Michigan.

SOURCE: THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

It could get ugly, or at least stupid, if those Hillraisers decide to cut the fool at the convention. Denver, Colorado has built temporary holding cells in a city-owned warehouse for those who violate the law during convention week. FYI: The first version had razor wire at the top.





New reports say that the razor wire was removed. I guess they didn't want pictures to come out of Hillary fans who had escaped either by chewing their way through the floor or shredding their faces and bodies into square centimeters - just to demonstrate against Senator Obama. I'm telling you, those people have the devil in their hearts...




Not that I really care, I'm just reporting. I'm not trying to find out if there's actually razor wire on those cages, so I'm staying in GA this week. Feel free to get arrested in my place and report the story after you're gagged, beaten and thrown against a chicken wire fence for fun. Like the Chappelle skit said, "If you've got hate in your heart, let it out."

I suspect that there will be plenty acts of random hate this week, as the new Democratic regime attempts to regain the reigns of control over the party, and Republickins do everything in their power to continue the chaos. For God's sake, man; she's even got something called a "whip team", which is supposed to be in place to overshadow the dissenters in her party who plan to disrupt the convention with noise, angst and hate. We'll see how good of a job she does "whipping" her own friends as they yell in her defense.

If you have an Obama t-shirt and plan to support the man in November, this is the week to bring it out. If you don't have one, buy one. They have some cool bootlegs in Five Points, off Campbellton Road and even Old Nat'l. Oh, and even if you want something free, MOVEON.ORG is shipping free Obama/Biden stickers to supporters. I think all you need is an email address, which you obviously have.

Word to the wise: If you're in Denver this weekend, don't trip; the police might get on some "Operation Heartbreak Hotel" stuff and straight gas you haters to death in that warehouse.


"Listen to me now,
Believe me later on..."

Khujo Goodie of GooDIE Mo.B - "Cell Therapy"

THE OZONE AWARDS ARE IS DEAD

Trae tha Truth punched Mike Jones in the face? Southern rappers are beefing? Rick Ross had his goons manhandle DJ Vlad - all down in Houston at the Ozone Awards? Really?!





I absolutely don't care. It's probably a good thing I wasn't there in Houston for this event. I still have some issues with a few people who attended the show, and I'd rather not start an epic fight outside of the venue. Trust me, if I get punched in the face a'la Mike Jones at an awards show, there will be metallic repercussions. Even though I have more than a few friends who were down in Texas attending Julia Beverly's cottage-cheese rendition of a black awards show, I declined to attend. Look at everything I missed...





So I'm passing off the torch on this one. The homie Maurice Garland wrote a recap of the show, and he's obviously not as slanted against the machinery of false cultural representation as I am. That was a joke.

CLICK HERE to read Garland's take on the 2008 Hozone Ozone Awards. In the meantime, here is another take on the truth from Trae. It's funny how snitching on yourself is the new album promotion. Oh well, that's why southern Hip-Hop is where it is today - half in the spotlight, half in the coffin.





And you probably wonder why I spend so much time writing about politics...

LINKS FOR YOUR LIFE - LIVE FROM BEIJING (not really)

[The Underwriter does not condone racial intolerance. But this is a funny picture.]


OBAMA'S ON VACATION, and to a degree, so am I. I quit my former day job last week, and it feels great to be alive. And still, no cigarettes. I feel as far away as the continent of Asia from my old life as I knew it two weeks ago.

See, I'm focusing on getting my shite right, so I quit doing a lot of things that were bad for my everlasting soul. As a result, I've been having mad, ill dreams about trailer-loads of girls and bombastic bus trips to exotic places where Amazonian women live without any male company. Sheeit, I've had some of the best sleep in years recently.

I do wish I was in Beijing in reality. Have you been watching the Olympics? Seriously, this is the only time in life that I'm really amped to watch sports all day long. There's something about the Olympics that makes sports seem innocent again. But alas, there is still turmoil afoot in the world, and death circles above us all like a skinny black vulture. No time to waste, no time to chill...

So here are a few deadly things that have been going on recently, just to keep you abreast of things and stuff. Here's what's been going down:


LINKS FOR YOUR LIFE!!!


War Games



Russia is still bombing the shite out of Georgia. I guess "cease-fire" is either not a literal term, or something must have been lost in translation. Either way, it's still war out there, and the Olympics served as nothing more than a distraction from the assault. CLICK HERE for the story.


Michael Phelps is Him



Michael Phelps, the American swimmer and the winningest Olympian of all time, listens to Lil' Wayne's classic mixtape track "I'm Me" as he prepares for nautical warfare. He recently admitted this to the media. As you should know, this dude is breaking swimming records left and right. Wayne haters, you can now drown yourself in wolf piss, or just CLICK HERE for the story.


Ozone Magazine = Hip-Hop Coloring Book



The Ozone Awards was a coon-fest of epic proportions. My homie Jacinta was in attendance, and she came back with several reports that confirm my decision to stay home and get zooted. I remember having the opportunity to interview Julia Beverly, Ozone's publisher, once, and I just changed my mind and canceled at the last minute, on some "who cares" shit. I discovered that I wasn't impressed. She just seems out of place, and under her guidance, the awards ceremony gets worse and worse every year. Oh well, she's still banking off you idiots that read Ozone, so CLICK HERE for the full unedited story, or CLICK HERE for the clean version @ Rolling Out.


Hillary Wants Some Effing Respect



Senators Obama and Clinton have reached a "compromise" that will allow Clinton's name to be placed in nomination at the Democratic convention. That means that even though Obama won the needed amount of delegates and has more pledged superdelegates than Clinton, she doesn't have the balls to tell her supporters that protesting, yelling and voting for her at the convention will be counter-productive, not cathartic. I think she's still trying to be V.P., but she doesn't know that you can't be a beeyotch about it and expect people to sympathize. Whatever. CLICK HERE for the story.


Keep R. Kelly Away from the Chinese Gymnast Team



It is being reported that Chester is not only alive and well, he might be Chinese. Team China has at least two questionable team members for the gymnastic squad. I feel like that's weird as hell, so I'm out, but you can CLICK HERE for the story.


Going to see Pineapple Express tonight with the homies. Already copped the t-shirt, because I heard the movie was funny as hell. For now, back to the games.


UPDATE: IMAGES ADDED (8/17/08).

THE OBAMA CRUSADE: Day 26

TODAY:


We interrupt this program to bring you this special, extraordinary bulletin of epic proportions. But first, a word from our sponsor. Don't touch that mouse!




Back to our regularly scheduled program, former U.S. Senator John Edwards of North Carolina, who was recently being vetted to be Obama's VP, has been dug up as an unfaithful spouse and veritable liar, slutmonger and dewshbag. If you didn't already know, Edwards's wife has cancer, and it is terminal, which makes John look like an even filthier piglet for cheating on his dying soulmate.

Not only did Edwards go public with his admission of guilt on Friday, but he did it right before the Olypics began in Bejing. That means that he knew it would be a small American news item going up against a weeks-long world news story that only comes once every few years. I'm dead @ this.


Without trying to judge or speculate too much on this one, I'll defer now to James Poniewozik, who has broken down the good and bad reasons why a journalist might be interested but probably would not cover this story.

My bottom line: It comes down to whether the story affects a public issue. This story at least bore investigation back when Edwards was a candidate. (Whatever any of us thinks about whether an affair disqualifies someone for office, a voter has every right to take it into consideration—even if for tactical reasons—when trying to vote for their party's nominee.) When Edwards dropped out, it was probably fair enough to ignore it: the fact that it was a story once, or might be a story in the future, did not make it a story at that time.

But with Edwards facing the possibility of getting shut out of his own party's convention, it would have been bizarre to simply let that pass without explanation from the media. It was not a huge, earth-shattering story, but it was a story. He must have known that—and Democrats sure as hell did, "private figure" or no—hence his disclosure (on a Friday, before the opening of the Olympics).

Now, of course, the press will probably over-cover the story in compensation, because that's what we do.

SOURCE: TIME.COM

So why is this relevant to Obama? Simple: Edwards endorsed Obama, and he could have been a veep candidate - you never know. Whether you have sympathy for him or not, you have to admit he was wasting everyone's time if he knew that this was lurking in his past.

They say that leaking your VP choices, if you're a major party candidate for POTUS, is a smart thing to do. If you let the media know who you're vetting, they might do an even better job that you or your limited team. Hell, these internet lurkers can and will dig up all types of dead dirt on someone that you could have sworn was the truth. Ask Axe Rick Ross.

Ain't that America?

LEGALLY-DEAD MCs

Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick, a.k.a. "The Hip-Hop Mayor", is legally dead, but you already knew that. Yes, this idiot cheated on his wife, Carlita, with his chief of staff, Christine Beatty.




Yes, he lied about it. Yes, he was brought up on federal charges of perjury. But now, yes, this dumb-ass took an unauthorized trip to Canada recently (probably for some good weed) and got his ass arrested upon returning to the city he's supposed to be running.

He is now in the hoosegow. The clink. The concrete hotel, if you will.




Check the excuse stupid-ass reason your homeboy gave when he offered an apology to District Court Judge Ronald Giles about his conduct:

"I've been living in an incredible state of pressure and scrutiny."

But Giles sent the mayor to jail anyway, telling him he would have given any defendant the same treatment.

SOURCE: TIME.COM

I'm dead @ this. I mean, you're a young, African-American mayor. You claim to represent my culture. You come from a politically-known family. You're even built like a football player, which is a breakthrough - people are sometimes weary of large black men in powerful positions. But despite all of these good things going for you, you couldn't keep your Piston in your pants long enough to be an example for young black men who might aspire to your job someday.




Please believe that the media is going to love this, especially when a black guy is running for POTUS. Let's just hope they keep dude locked up through the rest of the presidential campaign, so he doesn't have time to pull some of that Marion Barry "race card" or "it was a setup" bullshit.

I can't take it. I'm off to drink some white tea.

THE OBAMA CRUSADE: Day 19 (Si Se Puede!)

TODAY:

I don't want to cover this whole "race card" debate any more than I did yesterday. Even though I know that this will still be the relevant story for the day, unless something real happens or the Obama campaign makes some big announcement. It just doesn't deserve any more fuel. If ignored, it will go away, like an annoying and drunk fat girl that flirts with you at the bar.

So instead, I just wanted to remind you that the Hispanic vote is still up for grabs. And even if McCain seems likely to get a good amount of Latino voters in his column, it shouldn't even compare to Obama's draw, especially if the immigration debate heats up again before the elections. And I predict that the Democratic leadership will pull this one on the Republickins sometime close to voting day, just to remind McCain that he can't have it both ways. Either he takes a hit on the conservative side or the Hispanic. Who is more important to him?

Anyway, here go some YouTube songs that support Obama in Spanish. I haven't heard any of my Mexican peoples knocking either version from the Honda Civic, but it doesn't seem like a far reach. Especially since most reggaeton generally sucks to high Hell anyway. No disrespect.

THE OBAMA CRUSADE: Day 13

This guy is a machine, but even machines break down if not maintained properly.


Senator Obama was told today by a British conservative leader that he is looking pale (wow). Those of us with the light-skinded curse know that pale is not a good look when you're biracial. I'm just saying, I start looking yellow on the rare occassions I come down with a cold. But seriously, you can't afford to look sickly when you're a skinny mulatto with African descent running for POTUS.

Anyway, Obama has been in 5th gear all week, and it appears that his schedule is finally catching up to him physically. British Conservative Party Leader David Cameron took the liberty of telling the Illinois senator and presumptive Democratic nominee that he needed some sun.

Cameron told the candidate, "You should be on the beach…you need a break. Well you need to be able to keep your head together."

Obama told Cameron he would try to take a week of in August. And he said he got advice from a Clinton White House veteran on how to handle the demands on his time.

SOURCE: CNN POLITICAL TICKER

You can't even front on the work ethic. And he doesn't earn any stripes from me for doing this; I expect the POTUS to bust his arse keeping me safe and rich and comfortable. Otherwise, why the eff am I paying taxes? That's why we need a young man in office. McCain would literally get caught sleeping through his whole term. You can imagine him on a hammock, enjoying the cool Autumn breeze, then suddenly tilting over too far and falling to the ground on some end-of-Godfather shit.

At least Obama can withstand the demands of the job.


"I never sleep, cause sleep is the cousin of death."
Nas - NY State of Mind

RAP NERDS DON'T DIE - THEY MULTIPLY

CLICK HERE TO READ THE FULL STORY of how The Underwriter, your faithful and humble narrator, took part in a high-definition Hip-Hop discussion with four other pure rap nerds with presidential status in the game.


Shout to Billy X. Sunday, a.k.a. Dallas Penn, of XXL and iNTERTETS CELEBRITIES fame, for hosting a great Hip-Hop debate right chea on my stomping grounds of Cobb County, GA. The homie let me know early that he would be in the ATL this week, so I made a point to get up with him and a few friends at Taco Mac on the East-West Connector (near Six Flags) to discuss such relevant and immediate issues as The Dark Knight, Fonzworth Bentley, Lil' Wayne and of course the only five albums that a person could take on the Mothership. In attendance were Maestro (producer: Lil' Wayne's "3-Peat") and frequent XXL commenter Twerkolater.

It was a great night in Atlanta for rap thought. We consumed drinks, cigarrettes and topics like intellectual cannibals. Nobody was given too much free reign over their opinions, but everybody's words were respected and we all left feeling as if we had fleshed out our own ideas about how the game should be and how things really are today in the world of Hip-Hop culture.


And I was throwed like a horseshoe. I'm surprised DP even remembered any of this fuckery, because he seemed as drunk as I was. Shout to him for staying on point and delivering the story. I went home and crashed like Dale Earnhart (R.I.P.).



Until next time, Chea!






UPDATE:

CLICK HERE FOR MAESTRO'S BLOG


CLICK HERE FOR TWERKOLATER.

THE OBAMA CRUSADE: Day 11

TODAY:


Senator Obama spent the day in Paris. He met with the President Sarkozy today at the Élysée Palace. The two men showed mutual respect, with the French president stating that he is quietly pulling for an Obama victory in November. It is summed up in one line:

Sarkozy wishes Obama “luck” and says he’d be “delighted” if he wins.

SOURCE: THE PAGE

My opinion is that Obama knows that the U.S. cannot sustain the same presence in the Middle East without help. France has always been one of our closest allies; the type of friend that the U.S. loves from a distance and criticizes when they're not around. But they are an important part of European relationships, along with Germany.

Since Obama is mega-popular in both countries, it looks like we could even see France and Germany increasing their own troop numbers so that we can finally wrap this war up.

McCain is... losing.

THE OBAMA CRUSADE: Day 10

90 days to go... Hold on tight...


TODAY:

The candidate delivered a major speech to over 200k people in Berlin around 3pm EST. Obama used the speech to talk about the relationship between Europe and the U.S., and reiterated his call for unity among the two allies in the ongoing fight against terrorism.

"Yes, there have been differences between America and Europe. No doubt, there will be differences in the future," he said. "The greatest danger of all is to allow new walls to divide us from one another."

SOURCE: REUTERS

The location, known as the "Siegessaeule" or "Victory Column", is a monument to 19th century Prussian military conquests. I guess he picked it because it suggests that success in this election is obvious and unavoidable. Plus, it's a phallic symbol, and we all know how world leaders and their supporters like to see large stone penises protruding from the ground towards the sky. I guess it's supposed to show how hard the government is.




Whatever. At least it looks pretty cool at night (nolo). I might put a fake one on top of my house whenever my credit gets clean enough to get a mortgage that is not sub-prime. Victory will be mine.


So where's the competition? McCain is somewhere looking for votes in the heartland, eating coleslaw and tuna salad with small-towners, still yearning for the love he's not getting from the media, youth, Hispanics, whites, blacks, Asians, conservatives, liberals, independents, Christians, Muslims, etc. As of today, he was still trying to convice people that Obama is naive for not supporting the so-called "surge" in Iraq, even though Obama praised its apparent success.


If you ask axe me, Obama believes that if we would have sent those soldiers to Afghanistan instead of Iraq, we wouldn't be dealing with more drama right now in the region that is most unstable. And if we never went to Iraq in the first place, we could have easily sustained Afghanistan without now having to balance and shift our resources as emergencies arrive.


Victory is Obama's. Get used to it.

THE OBAMA CRUSADE: Day 9

TODAY:

Your favorite US senator is still on the move. According to THE CAUCUS, the online political blog of The New York Times, Barack Obama is tired from all the traveling, but still managing to keep his aura on full blast and his circle super tight (nolo).

JERUSALEM — First came Charlie Gibson. Then, Israeli Defense Minister Ehud Barak. Finally, it was Benjamin Netanyahu’s turn to meet with Senator Barack Obama here on Wednesday morning.

Barack Obama met with Shimon Peres, Benjamin Netanyahu, Ehud Barak, and Mahmoud Abbas on Wednesday.
(Photos: Ariel Schalit/Associated Press, Dan Balilty/Associated Press, Dan Balilty/Associated Press, Omar Rashidi/AFP-Getty Images)
This was all before 9 a.m., with twice as many more meetings scheduled before day’s end.
So when Mr. Netanyahu asked how he was feeling, Mr. Obama smiled and declared, “I could fall asleep standing up.”

SOURCE: THE CAUCUS

By the way, have you seen Obama's new jet? Sick as hell...


IMAGE: AFP



So now people are going to wait to see if he makes one of McCain's horrible gaffes on foreign policy. Too late for him to even compete with the geographical mistakes McCain has already given us recently. Dude has made up two different places on the world map: Czechoslovakia and the Iraq/Pakistan border. One never existed, and one hasn't existed in more than a decade.

Damn.

THE OBAMA CRUSADE: Day 8

TODAY:

CNN HAS PUT UP A STORY about how an Obama presidency might hurt the state of affairs in black American life. The theory goes something like this: if and when elected, Obama might make white people believe that everything is all good for black people now, and a lot of things that still need to be done to correct the social, economic, educational and legal imbalances, as they relate to minorities, will be ignored after inauguration day. In other words, we're all even-steven. No harm, no foul.

Steve Sailer, a columnist for The American Conservative magazine, wrote last year that some whites who support Obama aren't driven primarily by a desire for change.

They want something else Obama offers them: "White Guilt Repellent," he wrote.

"So many whites want to be able to say, 'I'm not one of them, those bad whites. ... Hey, I voted for a black guy for president,' " Sailer wrote.

SOURCE: CNN.COM

ALSO TODAY:


An Arab terrorist drove a bulldozer through a crowded street near the hotel where Obama will be staying while he visits Israel. Both civilians and the Israeli police deaded him after wounding 11 people. The attack is believed to have no connection to the arrival of Obama; he was not even in the country yet when the melee ensued. The full story is HERE.


AND FINALLY:


MCCAIN IS STILL TRYING, IN VAIN, TO SHINE. Since Obama has the media in a perfect plex right now, McCain needs some type of news announcement or event to bring "The Straight Talk Express" back into the limelight. He is currently teasing the media with the possibility of announcing his vice-presidential candidate this week. Romney is favored. Not a good look.



If you ask axe me, I'm wondering what McCain's going to do when Obama throws a homecoming party. This dude is on a fantastic voyage right now. You don't think that his popularity is going to go through the roof after this trip is over? And you really think Mitt Romney can save the Republickin Party?

And most of all, what the hell is this supposed to be?




Question: why would you pay to make a video that only shows how much everyone in the media likes or loves your competition more than you? Doesn't that mean you're the only one in the stands at your own football game?


"Put a quarter in ya ass, cause you played yourself."
Big Daddy Kane - "The Symphony" (Juice Crew)





Your thoughts?

THE OBAMA CRUSADE: Day 7

TODAY:

Obama's European Vacation continues. He is now in Iraq, although how long he stays is anybody's guess. Reports have him leaving sometime tomorrow for Jordan and Israel.

YESTERDAY, it was pretty much understood that Obama wouldn't meet with Nuri al-Maliki, since that should be the job of the current POTUS, not a major candidate.

Despite the Iraqi leader's recent call for a timetable for U.S. troop withdrawal — not a far cry from Obama's pledge to withdraw all combat troops within 16 months of being elected — it remains unclear whether Obama and Maliki will even meet this week.

SOURCE: TIME.COM

But today, OBAMA DID IN FACT MEET IRAQ'S LEADERS.

After being greeted by General David Petraeus at Baghdad International Airport, Obama toured the capital via a Blackhawk helicopter with Petraeus and his two congressional traveling companions, Democratic Senator Jack Reed of Rhode Island and Republican Senator Chuck Hagel of Nebraska. Later, he visited wounded U.S. troops at a military hospital in Baghdad and held closed meetings with five of Iraq's top political leaders — Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki, President Jalal Talabani, Vice Presidents Adil Abdul Mahdi and Tariq al-Hashemi and Deputy Prime Minister Barham Salah.

SOURCE: TIME.COM

The press is all over Obama right now. So much that the McCain campaign is bitching about some type of media bias. They're even saying that Obama is monopolizing the coverage, as if he had that type of power. Even worse, The New York Times refused to print McCain's recent op-ed piece in its newspaper, right after they printed Obama's.

Sorry to dissapoint you Republickins, but it looks like Obama's being primed for the position (nolo). And McCain is just taking a farewell tour before fading into obscurity. Where he belongs.

THE OBAMA CRUSADE: Day 6

Out of town in Afghanistan for just 24 hours, and my man Obama is already stirring up trouble.

Depending on who you believe, the Senator from Chicago either has or does not have the support of Iraqi Prime Minister Nuri al-Maliki in his quest to end the American military presence in 16 months.


Here's the CNN VERSION of the story:

"U.S. presidential candidate Barack Obama talks about 16 months," he said in an interview with Der Spiegel that was released Saturday.

"That, we think, would be the right time frame for a withdrawal, with the possibility of slight changes," he said.

But a spokesman for al-Maliki said his remarks "were misunderstood, mistranslated and not conveyed accurately."

SOURCE: CNN.COM

Now, just to keep it "fair and balanced", here is an excerpt of the version that you will find at SLYFOX.COM:

The statement by Ali al-Dabbagh came after an article was published by Germany’s Der Spiegel magazine which quoted al-Maliki as favoring the 16-month withdrawal window proposed by Barack Obama.

The article quoted al-Maliki as saying “U.S. presidential candidate Barack Obama talks about 16 months. That, we think, would be the right timeframe for a withdrawal, with the possibility of slight changes.”

Al-Dabbagh said al-Maliki’s views were “misunderstood and mistranslated” by Der Spiegel and that the prime minister backs a general vision of pulling out U.S. combat forces based on talks with Washington “and in the light of the continuing positive developments on the ground.”

Al-Dabbagh said statements by al-Maliki or any members of the Iraqi government “should not be understood as support to any U.S. presidential candidates.”

SOURCE: FOXNEWS.COM

In other words (mine), Iraq's prime minister probably should have consulted Bush before he went and endorsed anything pro-Obama without permission. Somebody's not being a team player, it seems.


All caught up. Moving on...

THE OBAMA CRUSADE: Day 5

SENATOR BARACK OBAMA IS IN AFGHANISTAN.


Time Magazine is reporting today that Obama will be staying for two days or so in Taliban Country, trying to get a feel for the region he has deemed the most immediately relevant in the War on Terrorism.

Now that he's there, I wonder what he's seeing right now. Is the Secret Service actually allowing him to see what they know is not safe for him? Are the Generals giving him the most accurate information they have? Does he have a G-Pass, off G.P.?


Here's a quote from Time:

As president, Obama has promised that he would redeploy two more US combat brigades to the Afghan theatre, ask NATO for more troops and fewer restrictions on those troops, accelerate the training of the national army and police, encourage alternative livelihood crops for opium farmers and help support the fledgling Afghan government. In recent weeks, his Republican opponent has joined the call for sending more troops to Afghanistan, and earlier this week Defense Secretary Robert Gates said that U.S. officials are looking for ways to send more forces to the country. Before he left Washington for Afghanistan, Obama told a pool reporter that "I'm looking forward to seeing what the situation on the ground is. I want to, obviously, talk to the commanders and get a sense, both in Afghanistan and in Baghdad of, you know, what the most, their biggest concerns are. And I want to thank our troops for the heroic work that they've been doing."

SOURCE: TIME.COM

Prediction: Obama's poll numbers (as if they mean anything) will go up at least two to six points after this trip. The media is already showing Obama much more love than McCain. More on that later.


Keep watching...