THE UNDERWRITER LIVES TO SEE 2009

Yes, bitches. I've made it. 31 years, and not a single bit of evidence that would suggest aging. Maturity? Surely. But I'm a child of God, and I retain my youthful spirit and I remain young at heart. I love being alive at this point in time.

Can you believe that we actually have a black president?! I mean, take away the horrible recession, the toxic sludge in the Tennessee River, the still-unfinished business in New Orleans, the pointless violence in Gaza, the ignorant racism of the Republikkkan party--especially in my beautiful south, the lack of self-belief and the persistence of power-lust and you have a serious opportunity for change. And, as you can tell, I'm not one for the fantasy way of seeing things. I see dead people.

I also see live people. I see the chance to make the miracles that we think only God has the power to perform actually happen, with our own work. And I'm ready to make my mark on the world. We're not in a recession, as it would relate to the richness of the human mind. We're more capable of thinking our collective way out of this mess that we've made than at any point in human history. Why waste it?

Give me the green light. I can go all night. And all year. And all my life. I've been ready to go, and right now is as good a time as any in my term on this planet. Let's all get serious about life this year. Let's not substitute anything for hard work and dedication. As my man White Jesus always says, "Get prolific."

If you read this blog, peace and blessings to you in 2009. Thanks for supporting writers and readers.

AULD LANG SYNE IN 2009

We're getting close to the end of this chapter, my brothers and sisters. And what I will tell you is that we need some motivational mottos for the coming year. We've still got Republikkkans on that racist b.s., Israel and Palestine are still beefing and the media is still hyping the recession. But there's good news all around, if you can sift through the seasoning salt.

Me? I'm taking the next 48 hours to determine what will stay and what must die in my own cypher. In the meantime, while I get my green on, here is a list of possible mantras that you might hear me drop once the ball in Times Square falls. Feel free to use anything you like in your own dialog with other progressive peoples. Add one if you wish!


THE UNDERWRITER'S
AULD LANG SYNE IN 2009:


Time to shine in 2009
(Be a star)

On the grind in 2009
(Don't wait for anything; go get it)

Smoke some Pine in 2009
(Why not?)

Vintage wine in 2009
(Spoil yourself)

No Calvin Klein in 2009
(Pause. Nolo.)

Grow some spine in 2009
(Where your heart at?)

Free your mind in 2009
(The rest will follow)

Please stop lyin' in 2009
(Real talk.)

Gon' get mine in 2009
(Get yours!)

First class flyin' in 2009
(As long as you're paying)

Fly design in 2009
(Swag is dead)

Not left behind in 2009
(Stay ahead of the curve)

Style divine in 2009
(Do it like Jesus would)

Deserve to dine in 2009
(I gotta eat)

Lead the blind in 2009
(Dumb rappers need teachin')

No mo' cryin' in 2009
(You can complain, but who'd listen?)

Beat Ben Stein in 2009
(Get money!)

Get off the vine in 2009
(Gossip and rumors are for girly boys)

Read, then sign in 2009
(Don't get jerked!)

Don't rewind in 2009
(The movement moves forward, not in reverse)

Clean vagine in 2009
(Because feminine hygiene rules)

Fresh behind in 2009
(Gentlemen: wash your draws)


This could go on forever. The point is that 2009 does not have to be lame as hell. Power to the people, wisdom, success, health, strength, honor and happiness to you and yours. And be safe out there on Wednesday night, whatever you do.

Peace!

Q-TIP LIVES?!

Pardon my decision to stay away from the whole "Yay, Obama!" blog movement since Tuesday night, but just so it's said and out of the way, I am not only thrilled about our new President-Elect Barack Obama, but I'm ready to start working on what must be done. The celebration and shock factor can't last too long; we have this weekend and the inauguration to party. Every other moment will have to be used for progress so that we don't lose this opportunity. So don't get gassed.

But if you do need additional fuel to move with purpose through all the hatred and sodium of our GOP enemies friends who lost their asses in the election casino, I can't think of a better new album to download for the freeski purchase at this incredible moment in history than Q-Tip's new jaint The Renaissance. First of all, the Abstract Poetic is just timeless; that's all. If I had to select one person as a living definition of a true MC with staying power and obvious love and concern for the artform, it would be Tip without a question. Remember how badly I spazzed out when Lupe Fiaschoe came sideways out of his neck after botching the Tribe tribute at the VH-1 show? You just don't diss Tribe, and Q-Tip is Tribe, and Tribe is Hip-Hop.





From title to tempo, this album fits exactly into the groove of today, as if it were taylor made to remind us that artistry doesn't have to change if it's good enough to make the world change on demand. Within The Renaissance, the rhythm, basslines, record scratches and samples all blend together with Tip's signature ageless voice to create the same feeling one remembers from the days when the Native Tongues were the Wu-Tang of the world.

If you're looking for some type of lyrical gymnastics, I'd suggest you go cop some Lupe and an encyclopedia to guide you through whatever the hell he's talking about. With Q-Tip, you get the benefit of a guy who is confident enough in his talent and intelligence that he doesn't have to try to prove it to you; he just displays them and lets you decide whether it's digable or not. Simplicity has always been Q-Tip's most effective tool, and he uses it to sooth the savagery to which rap music has been addicted for the past __ years. And before you ask axe, I don't have a favorite jam on this album. The whole album is my favorite jaint right now. Jesus, this one is right on time.

It's hard to be in a bad mood when the beat starts bumping along and the keyboards and the words start dancing along to the drums. Even when you wake up like I did this morning, at 5:00am, because a nerve pushed through and cracked a molar next to an slowly incoming wisdom tooth, causing me to reorganize financial plans for upcoming dental expenses. Teeth suck.





It's a good thing that I can look forward to living under the rule of a black president soon, plus these aspirins are working hard enough so that I don't have to pop the hydrocodone horse pill I keep in case of emergencies like this. When you add The Renaissance to this mix, I am far from complaining. Life is a circus of happiness and pain, and you have to balance the two at all times. Music like this from my man Q-Tip proves that even with the loss of his Ummah partner Jay Dee/J. Dilla and most of his records in a house fire ten years ago, the brother is an unstoppable force.

My, these is motivating times!! Shout to the homie DALLAS PENN.

HOW TO KILL A COLD IN 24 HOURS

Nobody has time to get sick and take a day off anymore, espeically in this wack-ass economy. Today I had to go to traffic court in C(ount)O(n)B(eing)B(usted) County to pay a ridiculous speeding fine, race back home before noon to finish an article by deadline, pay two bills, collect one work check and return a "favor" of sorts to someone at my old job who tried to get away with something shady. I must say that even with the small financial loss, which can always be replaced, today was a 100% success as far as a daily checklist goes. And I did it all with a severely nasty allergy cold--the kind where you sneeze violently and uncontrollably out of nowhere and for no reason, with leaking eye sockets and nostrils, red corneas and pale skin. I felt like I was the color green all damn day.

I'm something of an accidental health nut, and with the exception of beer, I really don't get down with a lot of mainstream food that tends to affect one's body. The crazy thing is that it's usually by accident. For instance, I hate cheese, with the exception of mozzarella on pizza. I'll drink a milkshake every few months, but I don't dig the taste of milk. And I'll be damned if I eat anything made of cream, from mayo to ranch to alfredo sauce. Again, this is not about health; it's all taste and preference.

Either way, I still get quickie-sick for a day when the seasons start to change, every year, like clockwork. So here's how I get rid of the bug when it bites.


WATER: The Essential Ingredient


You're supposed to drink 8 glasses every day anyway, but if you really want to shake a quickie-sick cold, you've gotta flush your system and stay hydrated. Especially if you're going to have 1 or 2...


HOT TODDYS: The Fun Part


Mix hot tea, brown liquor (preferably Courvoisier, Crown Royal or Jack Daniels), honey and lemon in a big-ass coffee mug and drank that ish. Good times!


CHINESE FOOD: Tastes Good, Seems Healthy


You've gotta avoid the fried stuff and anything creamy, because like milk, it carries bacteria through your body and prolongs the recovery process. But Hot & Sour soup is always a winner. While you're at it, you might as well get a bottle of...


SAKE: The Asian Wino's Hot Toddy


Sometimes this stuff can be a bit much to bear, but when you can't breath you can't smell the vinegar, so it loses the funky stench and just tastes like sour hot wine. Which still isn't great, but it does wonders for the chest.


ACAI JUICE: Antioxidants Are Gangsta


I've always liked the term "free radical." It seems like something that I could call myself. But these FRs are not good to keep around, so stuff like pomegranate juice, blueberries, cherries, dark chocolate, green or white tea, green veggies and other "superfoods" will wash away the ugliness that may have been hiding out in your bloodstream.


JALAPENO PEPPERS: Man Up


Eucalyptus, mint and peppers are great ways to jumpstart your nasal passages and breathing patterns. I've tried those little Vicks inhalers that look like suppositories, but the look you receive when you put one in your nostril and sniff it is enough to make you ashamed of yourself when you've done nothing wrong. I rock with the vaporizing balm, although it does kinda feel like Crisco when applying it. Let your lady do the honors; you'd do the same for her, right?


MULTI VITAMINS: For Extra Kick


You don't have to go buy a bottle of Centrum or anything, but having Vitamin C and Zinc is essential to this thing. Orange Juice is great, and Vitamin Water is aiight, but a supplement in the form of a big-ass pill works wonders. Trust your homie.


CHLOR-TRIMETON: Because Drugs Can Be Good


When allergies are kicking your pale ass around the house, you need to be practical. When you've had it with snotty tissue and brain-blowing sneezes, even the most hardcore naturalist will surrender to pharmaceuticals. I can't do Benadryl for the same reason I won't drink "lean." If I want to sleep, I'll just lay down. Benadryl works and all, but the drowsy side effect takes your entire day away and renders your alarm clock useless the next day. Claritin isn't bad, but it takes forever. Which reminds me; even when you become impatient and see no immediate results...


THINK POSITIVELY: Don't Worry; Be Happy


Maybe you can't wish yourself better, but you certainly can't expect to recover when you lay around, suffering, whining and talking about how miserable you are, even if you are. My thing is to subconsciously repeat to myself, "It's almost gone." By the time I'm tired of repeating the line or just forget to remember it, I'm usually feeing better. Some Bob Marley will also help, but no smoking, if you can help it.


This life is yours, in sickness and health. There's no use in giving up 24 hours just because of a 24-hour bug. Keep your mind and spirit healthy, listen to some good Hip-Hop and follow all of my advice. You'll be better than you've ever been by the second day, or double your money back. Oh yeah, what money?

Just take the advice, fool. You don't have to do all of the above, but make sure you drink water and pick whatever other trick you think best suits your lifestyle. Exercise can't hurt either, I guess; you can just dance like the dude below. Just get healthy, and don't say I never tried to told ya something good. Think about it: if Hip-Hop is to continue to survive we've gotta live longer and better lives.




If I missed anything or you have any tips, send 'em on.

RISE! YOU CAN ACCOMPLISH WHAT YOU WILL.

That headline was borrowed by a famous black man named Marcus Garvey. He was killed, like many other great black men, for standing up for what he believed was his life's calling. He wanted black people to be liberated - mind, body and soul. He called for a mass exodus to Africa by all black Americans (something I'm sure the GOP would love), because he wanted us to know our true historic lineage and heritage. He was about strength and unity. And he is now immortal, because a large number of people continue to carry his legacy into the future, even though he is long gone to those of us who will see the sunlight today.

What about you? What the eff have you done today, besides hit the snooze button multiple times because you were overthrowed (like me) last night? Sure, yesterday was a holiday for working people, so we all deserved a quick break before the fall kicked in. Well, we are now in Autumn, and in the midst of foggy, rainy weather, political craziness and the last four months of the Bush presidency. Rejoice!! And get your lazy ass out of bed and back on that clock. Time is money...

Me? I'm in Birmingham, chilling with my folk-folks and working on the fulfillment of a major goal. As of today, I have officially broken my addiction to cigarrettes with one full month of no nicotine. After today, I will no longer count the days; I've always believed that if you really wanted to stop doing something, you don't count the days since you've last done it. You just say, "I've stopped," once you knew that to be true.

Life is great. I'm happy as hell for no apparent reason, and I've been resorting to my old bad habits, like exercising, reading and refraining from things that keep me from being productive. I welcome you to join me in this thing called "life" in Autumn 2008. History is in our hands, if only we'd awake from the dream of yesterday and commit to the reality of this new realm of possibility called Tuesday, September 2nd.

I'll check back in with you later this afternoon, say around 2pm. Until then, grasp life by the horns and rise with the tide. The hurricane-which-shall-not-be-named did not destroy our beloved New Orleans, and there is a magnificient momentum of which all citizens of this planet are invited to become involved.

So wake up and live. Do something with yourself, and continue to fight the powers that be. Get like me.




By the way, this is not just for black people. White people, you need to wake your asses up as well and join the movement. None of us can do it alone.

GOOD MORNING: YOU ARE NOW ALIVE

This is what happened last night. Contrary to what Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and Christopher "The Notorious B.I.G." Wallace both said, before they were both assasinated, it was not all a dream. It happened.

As of today, Friday, August 29, 2008, the future is full of promise for those of us who believe in the natural right of all earth citizens to renew the spirit of God within us all. Once again, we can claim the royalty from whence we came. I do not watch the weather report, so I am uncertain whether or not the sun will shine where you awaken this morning, but it is certainly shining down in spirit upon the faces of those who see the dawn of a new day, even if it's through the rain of another Gulf Coast hurricane. And you can count me as one of those people.

We will not only survive the coming storm as a country, we will weather it and rebuild that which has been torn asunder, smashed against the rocks of racism and flooded with fear and loathing. Just as we have before, we shall again. We will conquer that which threatens our livelyhood and build a better tomorrow with the foundation that we have in this very day.

On this day, the Friday before Labor Day, which leads into the month I was born, I am happy, grateful and excited to be a living, breathing human being. And I cherish the fact that some great entity that created this whole idea called "life" actually thought enough of me to place oxygen in my battered lungs once again, along with the vision in my eyes, hunger in my brain and encouragement in my soul. I believe that this is the day that things will undoubtedly become irreversable on the path to a positive existence. And I am ready for the challenge of today, tomorrow and beyond.




I am awake. Now wake your punk ass up too and join the rest of the living; we've got work to do.

THE OBAMA CRUSADE: HISTORY IS MADE (Day 37)

Former Vice President Al Gore Jr. has just spoken at Invesco Field, a.k.a. Mile High Stadium, in Denver, Colorado. Wolf Blitzer just admitted that he was dancing, although off-camera, to the sounds of Stevie Wonder singing "Signed, Sealed, Delivered." An estimated 80,000 people have gathered to witness this event.



I'm, like, totally amazed and excited that I'm alive. I don't know about you, but this is some serious shit. If you're not excited too, I don't want to know you. And don't leave a comment on my blog either if you're a hater, because I'll trace your IP address and make you the laughing stock of the internet in my own special way that no one will ever have to know about. This is a big deal, and if you're not on my side, you're on the wrong side of history.



So this is how I'll start this post on this historic day. I'll be back later tonight to update it with the actual speech. The homie Chuck from UNDERGROUND LIVE is in town, so we're heading to downtown Atlanta to find the crowd and celebrate this moment.



Seriously, can you believe this is actually happening?

WAKE UP: YOU ARE NOW LIVING HISTORY

Who do you want to be today? What's so special about Thursday, August 28, 2008? When do you plan to thank God for the breath that's in your lungs? Where are you going in your life? Why should you be happy to be alive? How do we get even further than we are today?

All six of those questions begin with the starting words that journalists are taught to ask their subjects. Who, what, when, where, why and how. Allow me to add a seventh query to the list:

Do you care enough to be alive at this crucial time in history?


Today is the 45th anniversary of the deliverance of the so-called "I Have a Dream" speech by the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. He was a titan among all men, not just African-Americans. If my math is correct, he would be 79 years old today, if he were not assasinated by cowards who did not want to allow change to come about in American society. Unfortunately, like many great men and women who sought to make a difference in the way the world works, he was stopped short before he could see the future he helped develop with his own eyes.





Fortunately for the continuing development of African-American culture - and that is not to say that I don't wish that all cultures continue to develop, besides white supremacists - we have new heroes. Of course, Senator Barack Obama, who was nominated last night as the Democratic nominee for POTUS, is an outstanding, shining example. But there are others, oh my brothers and sisters.

You and I are included in that number of saints who can now march forward into tomorrow with pride, dignity, integrity and purpose. This morning is a great morning, and it is the foundation upon which the future will be built. So please, PLEASE, get your punk ass out of bed and join the rest of the new civilized world.

We are now evolved.

REALLY DEAD MCs

Tiny Dancer, the famous Chihuahua known as the world's smallest therapy dog, IS REALLY DEAD. The little guy was 5 inches tall and weighed 18 ounces. Awww...


It has been rumored that there is a bidding war going on between Rocawear, Sean John, Michael Vick and China for Tiny's carcass. Diddy and Jay-Z both want to skin him to make those winter coats with the fur lining on the hood. Michael Vick is craving some teriyaki dog jerky behind bars. And guess where they make that? China.






I mean, just look at Tiny Dancer's coat. That stuff could go for $200 a square millimeter in Macy's right now, just as they start rolling out the winter fashions. Sheeit, you might could even make an elegant hair extension out of that fuzz.

R.I.P. Tiny Dancer. You spread happiness to so many people. I hope that your afterlife your owner keeps your body out of the hands of carnivores and fur aficionados.

WAKING UP THE DEAD: THE TUESDAY MORNING ALARM CLOCK

To you, this post might have nothing to do with anything, but to me, it has something to do with everything going on in the world right now. You see, the most recent album by your favorite rapper is ony going to last 3-6 months. The flyest video you're going to see in the next week or so will only last until the beginning of winter, and that's if it's really good. That's a short lifespan, and it's only getting worse with more and more people calling themselves rappers and less shelf space available for old rap records. But classic Hip-Hop is immortal. Believe that.


R.I.P. Scott La Rock (Boogie Down Productions)


The problem is that our culture has been hijacked by hermaphrodites and hookers of harmony who don't care what type of music they make, as long as that music makes money and provides for another fiscal year of trickery and financial fuckery. This is probably where "making it rain" comes in, leaving the lower class feeling left out of the loop, wishing for a watershed moment when the odds are even and the ears and eyes of executives are open and exposed. Everyone wants his or her own time to shine, even if it is restricted to fifteen minutes; it's hard not to be a critic when you're riding in a Civic. Best thing to do is stop talking it and live it.'


"This one is for Dilla"... R.I.P. Jay Dee



Like Erykah said on "The Healer," our culture is bigger than religion, "my nigga" and the government. I would add that it should be bigger than money, but that remains to be seen. There are, however, some things that will always be bigger than Hip-Hop, such as life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness freedom.


Quiet as it's kept, Hip-Hop is even bigger than death. Some of our most beloved heroes have found everlasting life through their musical legacies. Word to Big Pun and Buffy of The Fat Boys, who were both big as hell but aren't here to see the new morning with us, like J. Dilla and Scott La Rock.







We're at the dawn of a new day, and all it takes is a majority of believers to overwhelm the minority of haters. But we can't get there if you sleep through your damned alarm clock. So climb your tired ass out of bed and join the movement of the living - those of us who care more about contributing than collecting, ones that are more interested in legacies than liquid assets.

REALLY DEAD MCs

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross died on this day of 2004. You may have no idea who she was, but she was something like an authority on all things dead. Her classic book, On Death and Dying, first published in 1973, confronted the experience of dying and turned Kübler-Ross into an overnight world celebrity. She is considered to be responsible for the success of the medical movement known as "hospice." So big she was, in fact, that Time Magazine named her one of the "100 Most Important Thinkers" of the 20th century in 1999.

Seems only right that she gets a tribute four years to the day that she found out whether or not she was right about her life's work.

She wrote MAD BOOKS.

She received HELLA AWARDS AND HONORS.

She was covered by THE NEW YORK TIMES.

Hell, I even found a STREAMING NPR INTERVIEW.


But just in case you're feeling lazy or just plain uninterested, here are a few quick quotes that I found interesting...

"It's only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth -- and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up, we will then begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had."

"We run after values that, at death, become zero."

"Those who learned to know death, rather than to fear and fight it, become our teachers about life."

*All quotes: Elisabeth Kübler-Ross. R.I.P.

FLOWERS

U.S. Representative Stephanie Tubbs Jones, the first African-American woman to represent Ohio in Congress, IS REALLY DEAD.

Rep. Tubbs Jones, who was also a member of the House Ways and Means Committee, was considered one of the more reliably liberal voices in Congress. She had a lifetime voting rating of 98 out of 100 on the American Civil Liberties Union's Congressional Scorecard. In 2003, she was one of 11 House members to oppose a resolution supporting the U.S. invasion of Iraq.

SOURCE: THE WASHINGTON POST

It can't be easy to be a black woman with political responsibilities in Washington, D.C. I can imagine one of my friends' mothers, or even my own, trying to work in an environment where you have to constantly push against a concrete dam of injustice to get even the slightest progress for the underprivileged. It seems like it could drive even the bravest soul to silence when you're always in the unseen minority.

Rep. Tubbs Jones did not let her skin color dictate her trajectory in the Congress. She worked extremely hard and had several important achievements, which you are more than welcomed to SEE FOR YOURSELF on her House website.


For her final encore, here is Representative Stephanie Tubbs Jones putting a CBS News reporter in her place for trying that pop-up-on-your-ass journalism trick. Old girl looked like she was a second away from what I call "the clap-slap."




R.I.P. Mrs. Tubbs Jones. I respect your authority.

THE OBAMA CRUSADE: Day 14

TODAY:


Now that the senator is back on U.S. soil, everyone is wondering what's going on with the Democrat's V.P. search. And wouldn't you know it, The New York Times is now speculating that Senator Hillary Clinton is low on the radar as a potential running mate.

The arguments for picking Mrs. Clinton have always been highly pragmatic, based more on electoral politics than anything else, as Mr. McAuliffe suggested in pointing to the vote-getting power she has exhibited. (For what it’s worth, some of Mr. McCain’s advisers said they view Mrs. Clinton as the single strongest candidate Mr. Obama can pick for those same reasons.)

These arguments have not held much sway with Mr. Obama or his inner circle. Instead, they have indicated that whatever political benefits might be gained by putting Mrs. Clinton on the ticket would be outweighed by the costs.

SOURCE: THE NEW YORK TIMES

On another note, my earlier predition that Obama would see a bounce in his national polling numbers against McCain has not yet come to pass. Everyone, even Republickins, have praised the Obama campaign for running a tighter operation, yet even after returning from Europe he has not yet found a larger number of supporters.

Most surveys now show Mr. Obama with a lead of about 6 or 7 percentage points over Mr. McCain nationally, and Mr. Obama rarely breaks the 50 percent threshold. Those are statistics that have given Republicans, who are not exactly feeling joyful these days, a line to grab, and they have fed some underlying anxiety among some Democrats.

“They’ve known John McCain for years,” Bill McInturff, a pollster for Mr. McCain, said of survey participants. “But people say in focus groups, ‘Who the heck is Barack Obama? Had you heard of him before six months ago?’ And he’s 46 years old. He’s somebody nobody knows about.”

Mr. McCain is “running ahead of where he should be based on the environment,” Mr. McInturff said.

SOURCE: THE NEW YORK TIMES

Give it some time, I say. Unless McCain has a tangeable answer for Obama's current globetrotter status, it's still not looking good for his campaign. McCain's supporters are just like their candidate - hanging on for dear life. The Democratic convention is approaching, and if the right correct person is chosen to be Obama's #2, you can expect the windfall to occur.

If I were Obama, I'd lay low and put the machine on cruise-control until the big party with the delegates. That's when it will be painfully obvious to all haters, racists, dummies, fools, morons, imbeciles, whores and idiots that there is only one viable option, and it is the African-American.

Expect the tide to rise soon, even as it appears that the waters are still.

KENNEDY IS DEAD; OBAMA IS ALIVE

I'm sick and fucking tired of hearing that Obama might get assasinated. I mean, really, Bush is still alive, so I don't see why Obama should be worried. If I've learned anything in the last eight years, I can say to my children that it has been proven - even if everybody hates you, you can stil be untouchable if you have friends in the highest of high places. So make sure you're connected, or the writing is on the wall...





But fear not, oh my brothers and sisters. Obama has had Secret Service protection for more than a year. If you'll remember, it was a big deal at the time, because he was the first presidential candidate to ever receive such security detail so early before an election. But it was a clear message to radical militias and general nutcases of all races: f you think you're killing him, you're more than an dewshbag - you're a dumbass. To be honest, I don't even know how close the S.S. is watching the Senator, but I would assume that you're safer around Obama than if you were a black man walking by yourself through Iowa. Therefore, a conversation about the likelyhood of his assasination before (and hopefully during) his presidential administration is a discussion that I'm frankly not willing to have. A wise man told me, "Don't argue with fools."


In my opinion, which might as well be fact, Obama will win this election by a landslide. But that's just me. Everybody else seems to be worried that Obama will face some type of OCTOBER SURPRISE, which is the new fear tactic being promoted by the "vast right wing conspiracy" (whuddup Hillary!). IT'S NOTHING NEW; for decades it has been the strategy of the republikkkan party to use terrorism, crime, nuclear holocaust, abortion, religion, "patriotism", torture and, of course, racism, to fuel their bitter constituents' fears and to rally the rednecks behind a political party that would always try to protect them from having to change with the times. But at least you and I know that the list of fear tactics in the republickin' playbook (nolo) goes on and on, as it has for generations.



Back to the point; everybody is associating the hype and historical relevance of Obama to JFK. I agree that he has all the charisma, character and promise of change that the Kennedys once embodied. But now, as it seems that we might lose the scion of the Kennedy clan to cancer, people are going to need something new. They require a person bold enough to stand in the shoes of greatness at a time when no one else believes it is possible. America needs somebody brave enough, and with enough security, to call the right wing bluff and bring some balance back to our broken planet. And we don't need anybody who's too scared of getting shot to execute change.


My definition of greatness is a state of being that lets a person go beyond contemporary boundaries, higher and further than anything in his or her circumference. Maybe Obama can't stop a bullet, but he represents an idea. Like Che Guevara, Martin Luther King Jr., JFK, RFK, Malcolm X and even Biggie Smalls and Tupac Shakur, it's already too late to stop the legend from being passed along. Might as well see what he can actually do. And if I had to name one reason why I admire him, it would be because I think he has almost no fear. Because the whole idea of this new reality we're living in is some wild shit stuff anyway. I can't even lie and say I saw this coming two years ago. Oh well, that's how revolutions go, I guess. The idea will always outlive the idealist. Word to Guy Fawkes.





Kennedy is dead, but his legacy lives like Che Guevara. Obama may not be Che incarnate, but he's definitely Kennedy 2.0. Upgraded, elevated and educated. Plus, he's raised more money. Can we just agree that this election is over, already?

Or here's a better question:

If America defaulted on that promise of "40 acres and a mule" for former slaves, and if reparations are out of the question, and if Juneteenth is a black American holiday that most white people have never heard of, and if Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton never got this far, and if McCain is 114 years old, and if Barack was the first black president of The Harvard Law Review (couldn't have been easy), and if Hillary couldn't beat him, and if Bush isn't the worst, then why the fuck are people so afraid of letting this guy, the obvious underdog with overwhelming appeal, have his chance at running the country without the janky-ass suggestion that, simply because he's black, he can't be allowed to win or he'll only end up dead before we can even see that change that we can believe in?

Man, don't get me started...


If the man loses, he loses. Let's not speculate any futher. And remember, I live below the Bible Belt, around rich white people. So if I seem like I'm salty, I'm just sharing my experiences in Cobb County, GA, with you. Hopefully the political climate for debate is better on your side of the world, because sometimes it's hell out chea in the South. But, judging from the recent cover of Rolling Stone, it doesn't seem that Obama is much worried at all...





You gotta love it.

NAS IS A SURVIVOR

See, I’m old school Hip-Hop, but not at all an old head. I can appreciate what the youngins are trying to do with it, but nothing beats some classic lines and lyrics from the rap era when it was all about quality. Cats like me throw out one of my favorite rap lines when having a conversation with BUCKMEISTER FULLER or WHITE JESUS, two of my best homies. Cat like you, I call you a “gladiator.” Word to Killa Cam.


Here are just a few of the lines that I might use at any given moment when dealing with music industry dewshbags. Especially when the time and the wine are right. This time, we’re taking liner notes from the boy Nasir, who’s Nigger Untitled album has a FIRM RELEASE DATE of July 15. I don’t want to cover too much old shit, because the youngin’s can’t relate. But here are a few of my favorite recent quotables from Nasty Nas that I think bear repeating for the true Hip-Hop heads out there. Not counting The Nigger Tape, his most recent mixtape with DJ Green Lantern. I figured I’d give you a reason to even check it out, if you’re really that late on hearing it.


Hell, I might as well help promote something worth listening to. You can ask axe anybody - The Nigger Tape is pretty damn dope, so I expect the new album to be HD. I’m excited. It’s gonna be a hot summer.


“I squeeze nipples like pimples
To get the pus – get it?”


“Nazareth Savage” – Street’s Disciple, disc 1
(That might be a triple entendre right there, if you think hard enough. Nolo.)


“The lane was open and y’all was droppin’ that garbage shit
Y’all got awards for your bricks
It got good to ya
You started tellin’ the bigger dogs to call it quits?!
What?!!”


“Carry on Tradition” – Hip Hop is Dead
(Seems aimed at Dipset; makes sense too)


“Miserable cats, hunger painin’
Get off your ass, stop complainin’!
My crew be in Montego Bay
Macarenin’
Marinatin’ while you home,
Waitin’ your arraignment…

…Certain cats they wanna kill me,
They ice-grill me,
But on the low,
Niggas feel me.”


“You Gotta Love it” – The Lost Tapes
(I love it. Self-explanatory; haters need a life)


“Ma, I’m sorry who the fuck I am
I can’t trust my fans
Out of luck, no constructive plans
My friends stay powdered up
I’m so drunk, can’t stand
You said if I would sober up
I’d be a powerful man.”


“Stillmatic Freestyle” – Unreleased
(This song, over the "Paid in Full" beat, rattled Jay-Z into making “The Takeover”)


“Sometimes I can’t help but feel helpless…
I’m having day-mares in daytime
Wide awake, try to relate…

…Human beings like ghosts and zombies
President Mugabe -
Holdin’ guns to innocent bodies
In Zimbabwe...
They make John Pope seem godly,
Sacrilegious and blasphemous…”


“Road to Zion” – Welcome to Jamrock (Damien Marley)
(Shows you how Hip-Hop actually pays attention to politics and humanitarian crises)


“You can’t revolve me, embalm me
Calm me or harm me
Rob me or dodge these bullets I’m bussin’,
See, that’s malarkey you yappin’
I open up the tri-pod
And put the Gatlin on,
And I start clappin.”


“Hustlers” – Hip-Hop is Dead
(I’m also a fan of The Game. Shit talk can be wildly entertaining when done correctly)


“Puttin old niggas verse the yougin’s
Most of our elders failed us
How can they judge us?”


“Be a Nigger Too” – Untitled
(An ill line on many levels… even my Mom agrees)


Good artists, real Hip-Hop artists, deserve better support, publicity and promotion. This way, they don't have to die first to get the cover of your favorite magazine. Word to Jadakiss.

"You know dead rappers get better promotion."

IF YOU ASK AXE ME

Washington D.C. just got wilder. The 32-year ban on handguns in the District of Columbia IS OFFICIALLY OVER. Who knows; maybe it’s a good thing for freedom, liberty and all that b.s. I mean, the Constitution does state that all Americans have the right to bear arms.

But, if you ask axe me, it’s awfully strange that this happens right when it appears that Senator Barack Obama might actually win the presidency. And if you live in or have ever visited D.C., you know that the hood is right around the corner from Pennsylvania Avenue.

I’m not one to advocate carrying handguns, because in my opinion, that’s why Ninjas are always getting shot. Simple math. Now a rifle, a knife or a scythe is much more preferable. But that’s just my theory.

Let’s just hope that this isn’t Christmas in July for racist militias. When Justices Antonin Scalia, Clarence Thomas and Samuel Alito vote the same way in a Supreme Court case, it’s usually bad news when it passes.

SOURCE: Reuters

"BLACK SUMMER"

Yo, I’m not the only one who thinks that this summer is going to be a permanent memory. And I’m only saying that so that the lames out there can wake the fuck up and start taking advantage of this moment in time. We’ve been waiting for some type of real movement, and it looks like we’ve wished it into existence, while working through the trials and tribulations of the last eight four-hundred years.

Now, let’s not get too excited. After all, the weather is crazy right now. Am I the only one who has noticed that cyclones, earthquakes, tornadoes, mudslides, wildfires, floods and droughts all seem to be showing up a lot more these days, with devastating results? I didn’t even mention hurricanes or heatwaves, because we know that’s coming soon. So, yes, it’s going to get even worse than it is now before the summer is over, if that’s imaginable. That’s a dark forecast for the planet.





But that’s not why I named this post “Black Summer.” Well, it’s not the only reason. Second of all, Lil’ Wayne officially jump-started and ghost-rode the Hip-Hop whip, which means that the south has risen once again. And because other signed rappers know the release schedules of major labels, they knew that it would be in their best professional interest to release their projects in the aftermath of a financial windfall. I’m very happy with the music that’s being released right now, and again, I’m not the only one. Energy is in the air.

Third, this is the summer before the first election in which a black man was the nominee of a major party. That’s fucking major. You and I know it, even if you don’t agree with my political philosophy. But the power of the black electorate is finally visible, and it now demands respect. We have a legitimate stake in this election, and I’m not even trying to say that you should be biased towards your race if you’re black. I don’t even worry so much about Obama’s ethnicity; I just think he’s a smart dude who is perfect for these crazy times. And others agree.

Black Summer, a.k.a “The Summer of ’08,” will go down in history as a great moment in the story of America. Shit, I might even go on and record that mixtape/EP that I keep threatening to deliver before August. Maybe. Until then, and until Hell freezes over, I hope to be here, happy and healthy, to deliver the story like Tim Russert would have done. So let’s make this summer one to remember for the ages, before the Reaper comes knocking for our souls. And try not to have too much fun…





Viva la Vida!

THIS WEEK'S OBITUARIES

In case you’re somewhat new to this seventh layer of Hell, which I like to call, “The Underworld,” you may not know that I keep track of who passes on, or in the funny cases, who kicks the proverbial bucket, from time to time. I mean, you’d think that a guy who calls his ink pen a "scythe" (and kills the competition) would at least keep an accurate account of who gets bodied along the way. Well, my weird friends, here is the bad news that you can depend upon me to deliver. In this case, we have one loser and two people who I don't think deserved their death sentences. But then again, I’m not God. Do me a favor, and please, pay your respects.



CAREER-DEAD/LEGALLY-DEAD (The Funny Part):
RAS-KASS




I’m sorry, but this dude is a f*cking idiot. This same guy BECAME A FUGITIVE years ago, while putting out mixtapes against his label, Priority Records. As if they were the reason why the law wanted him. I’m sorry again, but po-po doesn’t come after you for not releasing an album within the time limit of your recording contract. You’ve obviously broken a bigger rule than that.

So he goes on the lam, either gets caught or turns himself in (I don’t care enough to research it), and does a couple years or so. Comes out claiming to be “The King of L.A.” As if Snoop wasn’t still around. As if The Game wasn’t responsible for bringing the first multi-platinum plaque back to L.A. in years. As if Ice Cube wasn’t still selling gold – independently. Cube made more money off of one independent album than Ras-Kass probably received his whole career in label advance money. Which is, of course, recoupable (look it up). If you remember, Game was upset enough at some of Ras-Kass’s rhymes that he gave Kass a black eye, to match his black revolutionary disposition, I guess. Oh, the irony.





Now, according to Illseed, Ras-Kass is in the first few months of a three-year bidsky for who cares what. As in, right now, while I’m typing and drinking beer, he’s in jail. But if dude really thinks he can even start that, “I’m the king,” dewshery again, when he gets out in 2011, he’ll automatically earn one title: The Dumbest Rapper Alive. God knows, I don't want to see another rapper jailed, but - word to Lupe Fiaschoe – a good vocabulary doesn’t always mean that you’re smart.



REALLY DEAD (No Humor Intended):
Static from Playa and Juvenile’s Daughter


STATIC:




Do you know that Static was one of the best songwriters alive when he passed? Here’s what HIP-HOP ELEMENTS said about his passing:

Among the major hits Static wrote lyrics for are Aaliyah's "Are You That Somebody" and "Try Again"; Ginuwine's "So Anxious" and "Pony"; Nas and Ginuwine's "You Owe Me"; Pretty Ricky's “On the Hotline" and Truth Hurts' "Addictive."


Let me take it a step further. He also wrote “We Need a Resolution,” “Rock the Boat”, “More Than a Woman,” “Same Ol’ G” by Ginuwine, and one of my favorite songs that you’ve never heard, “Joy,” which was on Timbaland & Magoo’s first album. When I tell you that song is the truth, you should not only believe me; you should either go buy the album or download it. Trust me, the track is hard to find. But if you’re interested in finding out about even more songs he wrote that you might love, CHECK THIS SITE.

This is one of those stories that I find a little depressing, because dude was the serious truth. He could rap, sing and write, and I always told people that he was dope, even though I liked the fact that I knew something that other’s didn’t. Selfishness… yuck. He was probably one hit away from being a star in his own rite. Now, he’s gone, because of something nobody saw coming. R.I.P., Static. Cheers 2 U. At least it’s better than a bullet…


JELANI DELESTON - JUVENILE'S DAUGHTER




This one is… man. Four years old. Yo, I can barely even speak on it, because I have no idea how to comprehend it, how to cope with if I were a father, or how it could happen in the first place. Basically, Juvenile’s daughter – yes, that Juvenile – WAS KILLED by her older half-brother. He also killed his mother and another sibling.

When this type of tragic shit happens, it makes you wish you had the power to keep people from suffering in the first place. Then again, that might be vanity, which is a deadly sin. Let's just pray that Jelani is beyond the trials of this life, and is now freer than anyone on Earth - laughing and enjoying eternity, while waiting for us to join her and everyone else whose spirit was true enough to cross over into Nirvana while still somewhat innocent.

They say the good die young...



“This ain’t funny, so don’t you dare laugh.” – Slick Rick