9.06.2008

HYPHY IS SCREWED

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The news is that Bay Area rap star Mistah F.A.B. is "BEEFING" with the local Oakland Hip-Hop station, KMEL-FM. This is just another chain of events that sparked the creation of this new post, oh my brothers and sisters. Let's investigate the phenomenon of drug-promoting music and its accompanying culture as they relate to specific places on the American map.

Whether I'm a big fan of "Hyphy" music or not, you've gotta admit that it's dead, at least outside of Oakland's ungerground rap scene. As long as we're being honest here (and I don't know why we wouldn't be), most regional sounds that were sold as the next big things a few years ago are all dead.

I mean, look at "Screwed" music, and compare it to what happened with Hyphy. Both of these subgenres of Hip-Hop have been in existence long before some rich white dude decided to cut a mainstream check and put them both on. Representing Alabama, Georgia and Tennessee, I can attest to the fact that I've been hearing screwed mixtapes for close to fifteen years via cousins that visited Texas in the summer. It's nowhere near new. But what was new a few years ago was when Houston rappers Mike Jones, Chamillionaire, Paul Wall, Slim Thug and others started getting major record deals, one after another, all on the strength of a combined 12-month run of consecutive songs - all of which broke the local mold and went from regional to national recognition.

I admit, I was as proud as anybody else from the south that another state was finally getting its just due, as it were. But I also admit this: Screwed music sucks.





I never understood why people liked listening to rap songs that had been "screwed and chopped." Every time I've been forced to listen to any Screwed song for more than 15 seconds, it's always been depressing, sleep-inducing, boring and just... slow. Too damned slow. That shit would drive me to the depths of insanity if I ever got nabbed by terrorists and told that I'd be tortured with a 24-hour private Screwed and Chopped listening session if I don't snitch. I'd confess to all types of shit I've never even thought about doing to get out of that one. And I'd say that Gangsta Rap made me do it.


Once Screwed music got outside of its natural habitat, it was a wrap, because, like Hyphy, it was built upon pillars of salt, or should I say "snow." You can't expect a whole nation to become localized to your city unless the music is that good. Country music comes from Nashville, Bounce music and of course Jazz both come from New Orleans and The Blues were born in the Mississippi Delta. They all spread throughout their regions to national and worldwide ears, but there is a distinct difference: These subcultures are build around actual rhythms, beats, sounds, harmonies and melodies. Without great songs and plenty of great artists down for the artistic cause itself, it just doesn't happen. It's gotta be about the artform more than the afterparty, and both had better be better than anything experience previously if you expect the story to spread. And I'm not saying that Miles, Dizzy and Bird weren't getting loaded on the daily, because we all know how that story goes. But they were still great musicians.

Every city has it's own style that can't (and maybe shoudn't) be made global, especially when you add in the quietly kept secret that - gasp! - Screwed and Hyphy music are both really about doing massive amounts of drugs and being proud enough to sing and dance about it, out loud.

Compare and contrast: As the soundtrack to the lifestyle of codeine and promethazine abusers, Screwed Music was made for Texans who sip "syrup", the mixture of the two drugs combined with Sprite, Big Red soda or any other sweet, carbonated ghetto beverage. Rap artists, taking cues from the "slab rider" culture of Houston, drink it in public and continue to make songs glorifying its consumption, even after it killed one of its most famous rappers - Pimp C.

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In Oakland, Hyphy was created as the musical companion to taking Ecstacy pills or "beans", and the subsequent erratic speech, dancing and general behavior. To be high on E-pills, therefore, was to be "hyphy." Some of the Hyphy stuff I heard was nowhere near wack, but it was always a bit too crunk for my blood. And you've gotta be high to want to do some SHIT LIKE THIS. "Go dumb," indeed...

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I've pretty much held the same stance against Hyphy since I figured out what it was about. You can't have any type of positive message in a type of music that outright encourages drug use. Now before you even try it ("But what about Gangster Rap?"), I would argue that the social commentary that exists in the Thug Life style of Hip-Hop is necessary to show that people are economically suffering to the point that they would risk their lives and others' to make a dollar. So they pick up a gun and do horrible things.

I've always felt that if you make the terror of the gangster lifestyle look as ugly as it really is, you will save some people from ever wanting to enter it, even if you attract those who would wanted to be gangsters anyway. I never wanted to be a gangbanger after listening to N.W.A. - not once. But it was cool to hear their stories, accentuated by gun shots, excessive swearing and less-than-romantic ideas about women. To me, it's the same as watching No Country for Old Men; it's crazy, entertaining as hell and a great piece of art, even though it's gruesome to the point that I wouldn't have wanted to be in any character's shoes in real life.

The only way I'm convinced that a person can have any positive influence from Hyphy or Screwed music would be to suffer a complete meltdown, go through intensive rehabilitation and emerge from the ashes of doom like the Phoenix. Either that, or the artist just overdoses and dies, causing enough grief from fans and guilt in the hearts of close associates to spark a movement of sobriety, removing all the momentum from the power of the drugs and placing it back in the hands of the people to create things that don't cause mental damage and self-genocide.



It's my theory that the reason why TEXAS MIGHT BE DEAD and HYPHY IS REALLY DEAD is because you can't mix narcotics with your music and expect everyone to follow mindlessly forever like the living dead. Eventually, people wake up and realize they've been drugged. And then what?


But I can't front; THIS SONG is still dope. But if you listen closely, it's not all happy. Just listen to the chorus...

DIG THIS: ROLLING STONE'S 25 FUNNIEST WEB VIDS

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Rolling Stone just dropped it's "25 Funniest Web Videos" list, and it already stole an hour of my Friday night, because I'm a nerd like that. I won't give it all away, but I had to put this one up again, because in my view this could have easily been #1:




R.S. used a different version, but I think the one ^ was actually much funnier and straight to the point. By the way, this happened in the "D", where it's so cold.

9.05.2008

T.O.C. #43: THUG MOTIVATION

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Young Jeezy's album dropped this week. I haven't reviewed it, because I've only heard half. But the half I heard was great. I will say that I'm very happy that the Corporate Thug publicly announced that we was registering to vote for the first time in his life (he's 31) and HELD A VOTER REGISTRATION DRIVE at Justin's this past Thursday. I'm usually half and half on Jeezy when it comes to albums, depending what day of the week we're talking about, but with album that Hits Magazine is projecting will sell 250k units before next Tuesday and his own steady but calm support for Senator Barack Obama, I have to say that Jeezy definitely earned another 12 months in the limelight.


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A key thing that I would remind any supporters of Obama right now is that none of the nonsense matters. All that matters is that people vote for him on November 4th. And in order to do that, people must register to vote by the first week in October. If you are not registered, you have 30 days. HERE'S A LINK TO FIND OUT MORE INFORMATION. Pass it on.


Oh, and if you're starting to worry about Palin, maybe you shouldn't have watched her speech, I guess. I'm over it like I was never under it - the spell, that is. The sooner that the rest of us stop talking about her, the more they're going to have to come up with something real for her to say. Right now, their running off hype, and it'll continue as long as people gossip, which means she could ride a wave of distraction straight into the White House. And we'll all be looking stupid as hell for letting them get away with it.

Therefore, unless she makes any real statement that has to do with keeping the actual citizens of country from being any worse off economically, I have no interest in covering or speaking about her. Remember, this race is not about her, anyway. Besides, this is the first of many fights for which Senator Joe Biden was hired. That, of course, does not mean I won't shoot an occasional jab at the Republikkkan ticket as a whole; I just don't see a reason to give her attention when the issues are much bigger than her and her family.

More good energy for you is at the bottom. Take it and run with it to your nearest voter registration office or website. And don't let anything keep you from having your name on the roster if you're legally able to cast a ballot. We've only got one turn to get this right.

DIG THIS: THE HIP-HOP PING-PONG MOVIE


Ping Pong Playa- Official Trailer - The funniest bloopers are right here

What chu know about that PING PONG PLAYA, playa?

That sounded pretty lame, huh? Not as lame as this movie sounds and appears to be, oh my brothers and sisters. It seems that we as a nation are finally crossing the burning sands of race, religion and even the boundaries of geographic location. Now, Chinese people want to "act black", and it's all good. At least, that's what Hollywood wants you to think.

Ping Pong Playa is a movie that's new to U.S. theaters, starting today in Los Angeles and moving east, in which there's a guy named Christopher Wang, a.k.a. Jimmy Tsai, who is the little brother of a champion ping-pong player. He is supposedly "ghetto", and he hangs with a black dude. And that's about it. Not that I've seen it, but joints like this are usually exactly what you'd expect after seeing the trailer, which we now have already done. Lot's of slang, stereotypes and stupidness for young Ivy League Republikkkan weedheads to see and equate to black culture. That sad part is that some of you might buy it when it's hits DVD. SMH.

LEGALLY-DEAD MCs: ASSISTED STAGE DIVING IS DEAD




It was announced that your boy Akon is heading to court on December 1st, unless he has somebody to snitch on or accepts some type of plea bargain. It appears that his fan toss last year didn't go over so well; the 17-year old boy that got literally "throwed off" during a concert performance either decided to press charges or the state of New York just took the liberty of filing them itself.

ANOTHER ANGLE:



Either way, if I were a major Hip-Hop/R&B star, I would think twice about helping a fan to crowd surf. Hell, there's even another person who was in the crowd that says she suffered a concussion because the airborne dude fell on her when Akon did the human shot put. Jesus; these days, everybody is a potential plantiff. Let's see how the judge sees it. Akon better hope that he finds an African judge. It won't be good news if he gets somebody that looks like Wapner.


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