REPRESENTATION WITHOUT TAXATION IS DEAD

First of all, the governor of Illinois looks like an aging porn star. That mop he's wearing is too suspect for words. But if he intended to upgrade to the JOHN EDWARDS HAIRCUT price range, he should have figured out a better and more realistic way to earn the chee$e he needed to pay the bill, instead of charging others to play the political game and getting recorded over a federal wiretap. What a dumbass. But alas, you already know that politicians are not smart. And if you haven't already seen the video of Patrick Fitzgerald, the same U.S. Attorney that brought down Scooter Libby in the C.I.A. leak investigation, then check out this YouTube of Pat reading aloud the alleged words of Governor Rod Blagojevich, which I guess were recorded and transcripted. As you can tell, "bleep" is the new "fuck."




In other political news related to Hip-Hop, CNN.com ran A STORY ON COMMON, Chicago's original native son, and how he believes that Obama will change Hip-Hop for the positive. I have to say that the homie is 100% on point. It's going to be awfully hard to rap about selling drugs, pimping hoes and gang life when the POTUS is a black Harvard Law graduate and has an extremely intelligent wife and two beautiful daughters. Mark my words; it won't be long until Obama has to rebuke some dumb rapper for saying something sexist or crime-related in the same rhyme that he celebrates having a black prez. If Obama will turn his back on a corrupt white dude with whom he had political history, he will certainly throw a cold elbow to Shawty Lo or Gucci Mane or one of those other cats. Shouldn't matter much to them; they can still hurry up and make an Obama song while the frenzy still hasn't peaked. Obama ringtone, anyone?



Everybody is making money off Obama right now, or at least trying. Even my sweet old grandmother fell for the PAINTED OBAMA COIN commercial and paid $29.99 by credit card for a set for your faithful and humble narrator. God bless America. Obama might just sell us out of this recession. The question is, does Obama own his own name, or does it now belong to the American public? Who's really getting taxed, oh my brothers and sisters?



Cash rules everything around me.

LEGALLY-DEAD MCs

I'm late like a pregnant MILF on this, but just for the record, Da Brat, aka Shawntae Harris, aka Lisa Raye's adopted sister, IS LEGALLY DEAD.


Ms. Harris, known for being introduced to the Hip-Hop world by Jermaine Dupri as the older sister of Kris Kross and the female answer to Snoop (Doggy) Dogg, was sentenced to three years in prison for assaulting an employee of Studio 72, Dupri's club in Atlanta Tucker, GA.

Side note: The recipient of the bottle to the dome was also an Atlanta Falcons cheerleader.

The rapper and a half-dozen family members all broke down after hearing the sentence.

"I love y'all," she said to her relatives as a deputy hauled her away, the Atlanta-Journal Constitution reports.

"We love you too," her family replied in unison.

SOURCE: US MAGAZINE

Harris is also known as a "good friend" of Mariah Carey. I wonder how this will affect the relationship with Nick Cannon. Better yet, I wonder if Mariah, Jermaine, Lisa or any of Brat's other famous friends will have any pull in getting an appeal. So far, it seems like it's being accepted as the way it is.

For the record, I actually always thought that Da Brat could rip any female artist (nolo). Remember the "No One Else" remix, featuring Lil' Kim and Foxy? Those were the days when women were on the rap music come-up. Now? Well, all three of them can call themselves convicts. Sexy? Not at all.





UPDATE: I'm hearing rumors that the sentence got reduced to a year and a half, and they're trying to get it down to 1 year. Good luck with that. Keep your head up, Brat. And tell J.D. to drop a mixtape or something soon, so the buzz will be sustained. What buzz?

LEGALLY-DEAD MCs

Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick, a.k.a. "The Hip-Hop Mayor", is legally dead, but you already knew that. Yes, this idiot cheated on his wife, Carlita, with his chief of staff, Christine Beatty.




Yes, he lied about it. Yes, he was brought up on federal charges of perjury. But now, yes, this dumb-ass took an unauthorized trip to Canada recently (probably for some good weed) and got his ass arrested upon returning to the city he's supposed to be running.

He is now in the hoosegow. The clink. The concrete hotel, if you will.




Check the excuse stupid-ass reason your homeboy gave when he offered an apology to District Court Judge Ronald Giles about his conduct:

"I've been living in an incredible state of pressure and scrutiny."

But Giles sent the mayor to jail anyway, telling him he would have given any defendant the same treatment.

SOURCE: TIME.COM

I'm dead @ this. I mean, you're a young, African-American mayor. You claim to represent my culture. You come from a politically-known family. You're even built like a football player, which is a breakthrough - people are sometimes weary of large black men in powerful positions. But despite all of these good things going for you, you couldn't keep your Piston in your pants long enough to be an example for young black men who might aspire to your job someday.




Please believe that the media is going to love this, especially when a black guy is running for POTUS. Let's just hope they keep dude locked up through the rest of the presidential campaign, so he doesn't have time to pull some of that Marion Barry "race card" or "it was a setup" bullshit.

I can't take it. I'm off to drink some white tea.